The event was in the Edison downtown – absolutely beautiful club space. I literally almost ran into Jerry Brown as I came in the door – had to do a little dance and an “excuse me” (cool – he looks great!). This was the first time I’ve ever attended a fund raiser – I rarely give the kind of coinage you need to attend these.

But I truly believe this is the most important election of my lifetime. This will be the difference between continuing to go in a direction of faith-based vs. evidence-based governance. While I find it incomprehensible that any thinking person could vote for a ticket with Palin on it, I understand that many people vote for “boutique” issues (they only care about one thing – their hot issue). I do think the economy has made many of these people start thinking, “Is it really in my best interest and the best interest of America to vote on one single issue?”

We are facing the consequences of a decade of greed, mishandling of government, incompetence, and mediocrity. It was as if the “Dumbing Down” of America was institutionalized.

Many long-time Republicans, both big names and regular folk, are waking up to the disaster this party has wreaked on this great country. I know quite a few who have switched their vote for the first time in their lives.

People finally are realizing that “Lower Taxes” is not an economic solution. There are low-tax countries in the world. They are not places any of us would want to live. We have to hope our country doesn’t sink that low.
Americans must become true Patriots and be willing to pay our debt. If not, the crushing burden will weaken us for decades. True Patriots are willing to contribute to save their country from economic disaster. There is no benefit in having low taxes if your 401K has been cut in half, the dollar is worth half of what it once was, food costs double, and maybe even you end up unemployed.

Hillary Clinton spoke at the event – she is very impressive in person. Sometimes in the big events that are telecast she comes off as a bit rough – she is nothing like that in person. She was charming, even joyful, and she inspired the audience (she walked around after and shook our hands).
Bon Jovi played two songs – they were great!

I enjoyed being part of something – a movement toward a brighter future for all Americans – not just the top 1% who made a killing while destroying the wealth of many Americans, including Americans too old to ever regain the losses in their retirement accounts.

1004081744.jpg

Originally uploaded by Smash Monster

Found a comfy seat near the stage where jon bon jovi will perform

So here I am trying to get back into the swing of things.

Last week I made a trip to Florida to visit my mom (see puppy pics below) and had a nice time in the humid, mosquito-laden swampland.

On the estate front: the will was allowed! Amazingly, The Uncle from Hell did not try to make trouble. Even my aunt’s long-time attorney was shocked. Now it’s just onto estate taxes, distributing, and getting things in order.

My aunt left me her house on West Yarmouth (Cape Cod), which was such a sweet and lovely thing to do. We always had a special connection and being named after her was a great honor. I have missed Vera terribly but I feel very privileged to have spent so much time with her the past two years.
Work has been particularly hectic – I was asked to take over content and SEO for the whole company (vs. just the Aspen youth division) so that has meant a lot of focus on learning the whole landscape of their Internet strategy and network and catching up on updates and changes. The sites sat pretty idle over the last year, so it was like a tsunami of work at first. I’ve now gotten into the rhythm of it and I’m really enjoying the broader content work.

I have found four new freelance writers who are wonderful – but the best finds were two full-time writers – I could not have imagined I would get two people so perfect for the job! It makes life so much easier when you have talented, diligent colleagues.

Now I have been using Lulu.com to create family memory books, customized for the family member. I have one for my mother, and now one for my aunt. The pictures I have go back to the early 20th century in Sicily.
I love this one, mainly because of the names on the back of the photo: Dante, Beatrice, and Leonardo. What wonderful names!

I also found some that unfortunately do not have any notations written on the back (people! write something on the back of photos – 100 years from now no one will know who it is!)

I think this might be my Aunt Carmen on a pony, circa 1921 or 22

And I just love this 1927 photo of my mom’s family at Lynn Beach in Massachusetts – she is the little girl in the front row (looking down, with curls, about 3 years old)

…they warn, if you should feel compulsions related to sex or gambling, talk to your doctor…

Sheesh. So your legs will not be restless but you might start walking like you’ve been riding a horse.
So out of curiosity I look around the web and find that lo and behold, a number of law suits have been filed claiming users of the drug developed a compulsive gambling addiction.

Just another lovely “fix” for what ails you.

I just find this very amusing. Of course, this didn’t stop me from signing up. It used to be the “season” was over and you’d watch a lot less TV. Now the seasons just keep coming with channels like FX, Showtime, HB0…
All these channels, bizarre new shows, year-round possibilities, digital recorders, and friendly reminders make TV addiction just a little bit, well, stressful

I chose this as a memorial picture for my father, who passed away on May 5th, because he really loved our Morgan horses. He even built his own cart – which you see him riding in here. He traveled the state of Florida showing with Wayward Jasper, the Morgan horse in this picture.

Greed is a powerful motivator – we see it impact our economy in many ways (just look at the housing bubble) and we know it tears families apart.

The solution to greed? Recognizing that more money does not equal more happiness. Once you get past the numbers you need to live comfortably and have a pretty decent life, it really becomes more of a crutch than a happy-maker. Think of all the things you “need” today that you didn’t “need” when you made less money five years ago.

It’s particularly odd when people only a few years away from death get greedy. What the hell are they going to do with it anyway? I guess buy a really nice vault and headstone. Maybe it’s that last grab for meaning – at least I died rich.

I’ve seen this over and over. Don’t get me wrong – I know some very religious people who lead truly spiritual lives – they do and wish no harm to others. However, we have all read the stories of “men of religion” who have sinned rather egregiously. Visiting gay prostitutes after a sermon denouncing homosexuals is one of the most extreme examples – but we have all seen less obvious examples of sanctimonious blow hards living not-so-stellar personal lives.

These contradictions lie in the infinite capacity of humans to compartmentalize – they can be quite “good” in almost every area of their lives, but there is one area where they are able to rationalize and manipulate truth to fit a personal paradigm of “good” that any strongly ethical person (religious or not) would find disturbing at best.

As a young person, I was sent to a private school in my hometown (Seminole, Florida) for a few years – Keswick Christian School – because the public schools were having ‘unrest’ (polite way of saying racial tension – these were the early years of school busing). I was one of three Catholics in the school – the other two being my little sister and a girl who was to become a good friend an ally, Carol. I went to Sunday School, mass every Sunday and every Holy Day of Obligation. I was a good little Catholic girl. And now I was at a good Catholic-hating Christian school.

Three years later my mother finally figured out this was a big mistake – I think when I tried to convert my Jewish friend she realized these people were brainwashing me into becoming a pious asshole. It was a horrifying moment for her I am sure – since tolerance was a big part of my mother’s religious beliefs. But what was I to do? I was 11 years old and had beaten into me (sometimes literally – with a paddle with holes drilled through it so the wind would pass through more quickly to give a faster swat) that anyone who didn’t follow THESE SPECIFIC BELIEFS was going straight to the burning fires of hell.

I now look back on my days at Keswick Christian School as a lesson in what it is like to be the victim of intolerance. The constant weird looks when I did the sign of the cross, the comments about my religion (You worship Mary), and rather rude treatment by teachers (went from a straight A student to a struggling student, and not so coincidentally became a straight A student at the next school I attended) all made me feel like a pariah doomed to damnation. These were really prejudiced people who hated everyone who did not believe what they believed – not exactly Jesus-like in their behavior.

That experience helped me understand what it feels like to be targeted by unreasonable people within a community. I’m sure it was nowhere near as bad as being the first black family in a white neighborhood – but it did teach me a valuable lesson about what it is like to be singled out. It is cruel and hateful. It is the opposite of Christian.

As an adult I have seen examples of this sanctimonious hypocrisy – although usually in subtler forms. It might be the hyper-religious adult who follows, oh say, 8 of the 10 commandments. They are horrified by “goddamn” but rationalize embezzlement (You shall not steal). They are faithful to their wife, yet say false things about other people (You shall not bear false witness).

If there is a divine grading system, I have to believe that God judges far more harshly the sins of people who most vociferously proclaim their piety than those of people who openly admit their frailities and work diligently to change their flaws.

There certainly wasn’t a preamble to the Ten Commandments saying, “Thou shalt follow more of these than thoust do not” – it’s 10 and 10 is what you are supposed to follow if you are truly and purely Christian.

I would imagine some of these people at times experience waves of shame at their behavior, but others most likely continue to rationalize it and create exceptions to the rules. It just reminds me of something I learned decades ago at that “Christian” school – sometimes the most Christian people are not religious at all.

We’re still waiting to hear what might be going on – a few things found but they don’t necessarily explain the extreme jaundice and exhaustion.I said to him – this is so out of the blue – from totally healthy for 75 years to this ill in what seemed like a split second. He remembered our talk about flight 93 – that myth of certainty that your day will go a certain way – and then something unexpected changes everything in one horrible moment.

We mused about this a bit – really the myth is critical to live a happy life – in fact, those who live in a state of constant anxiety and worry are the ones who have rejected the myth (for whatever reason – biological, psychological, situational).

Try to imagine living a month, a year, a decade with no sense of certainty. My stomach churns, my breath shortens, and I feel a sense of dread even imagining such an existence. Face it, though, some people are better at maintaining the illusion than others – some people can face the most daunting circumstances with aplomb. Others are all-aquivering at the least sign of uncertainty. One can only hope to live somewhere in the middle – not like the Fool stepping off the cliff, but also not the Nervous Nelly considering every “what if” and “oh no this might happen”.