Browsing all posts in UpsideDown News.
Flying with Colonel Hunt
Some of you may recognize Colonel Hunt’s picture – he’s a commentator on war-related stories on Fox. (My brother-in-law wanted to know why I was watching that Republican news channel – I snarked – know the enemy). We shared a row on Jet Blue coming back from Boston last week. What an affable, interesting guy! I recognized him right away and we chatted a bit. He’s got a great, distinctive rough voice that just says, “I’m a Colonel and I’ve ordered troops around!” The kind of voice that makes you sit up and take notice.
He’s got an impressive bio – this was one of the cooler celebrity spottings I’ve ever had 
because he is so authentic!
He has a book out now, and his new one “On the Hunt” will be published in April 07. He was reading a book on suicide bombers on the plane – eeek – but I must say I felt a little safer being on a plane with the Colonel!
Selling Out by Selling Off America
When I heard today that the Committee on Foreign Investments in the United States has approved a deal that would give control of major U.S. ports to a country with ties to radical Islamist terrorism, Dubai, I was shocked, but not that shocked. I mean, when you “worry” about permanent tax cuts for America’s richest while cutting medical benefits to the most vulnerable, it is clear that your priorities lie with keeping rich friends happy.
Does anyone wonder what happened to our government? It has always been imperfect, but I cannot recall a time when it was so dedicated to anything that would make a few people rich and leave the vast majority of the American people in danger.
The only good side of these sad and disturbing practices that clearly show the White House does not really care about the average American – only about big business and lobbyists with fat wallets – is that I have to believe one day they will all come tumbling down. I just hope it’s not in dirty bombs strategically placed at the major ports (New York, Baltimore, Miami, New Orleans) we just sold to a country that still recognizes the Taliban as the official government of Afghanisthan and still does not recognize the right for Israel to exist.
What’s next? If we want to continue to stay afloat and cut taxes we need to sell off more of America, even strategic assets that will make the difference in surviving conflicts over the next 50 years. If China controls manufacturing and Dubai controls major ports, we might find that rather than being the one who controls the flow of goods is suddenly now on the receiving end of politically motivated embargos.
Cute Little Labrador Puppies as Drug Mules – Sick Bastards
Frankly, I don’t know why we don’t just legalize drugs and let the losers who want to use go ahead and use and then put the “War on Drugs” money into treatment.
This new Medillin trick of surgically implanting heroin packs in the bellies of labrador puppies shows that no matter what you do in the war on drugs, they will find some other perverse way to get drugs into the United States.
Suggested Things Bill O’Reilly Should Fight Other than His Fictional “War on Christmas”
Now he thinks Catholics are against Christmas. Uh, duh, the Catholics were the first to celebrate Christmas and many of us raised Catholic remember how our strict-Catholic moms insisted no Santa Claus, no secular representations at Christmas – it was about the birth of Jesus. Gifts were more symbolic – the other kids (non-Catholic or not strict Catholics) always got a lot more bootie for Dec 25. Asking for a list of gifts was considered in bad taste.
I really worry about Bill – as Keith Olbermann has pointed out, there is a delusional quality to his rant.
I think the best way to help Bill is to give him some other causes to fight for – causes that are, well, important. These “important” causes might help keep the delusion fairies from dancing in his head. Here we go:
The 14 million children who go to bed hungry in America
Pollution so bad in some cities people can’t go outside
Families without health insurance who go bankrupt trying to save their children from cancer, diabetes, heart disease…and so on
Violence against women – in American and throughout the world (rape, assault, being murdered by husbands or boyfriends)
Dropping literacy rates in America
That’s enough for now – that should keep him plenty busy.
Rioting in Australia
The coverage of the anti-Middle Easterner (well, really, let’s be honest – these aren’t brain surgeons starting these riots – so it’s really anti-anyone whose skin seems a little on the darker side so maybe they could be from the same place as someone who blew up a nightclub in Bali or the like…but who cares if they really are because we are brainless, testosterone-driven, drunken monkeys who just want to bash some heads) rioting in Australia is pretty good in this article – check out the photo gallery. Good to know every country has their share of worthless bums.
Heidi Fleiss’ Stud Farm
So Heidi is shaking things up with a twist on the old-fashioned brothel – it’s for WOMEN.
Lester Brandt, the first “stud” she picked for her new legal brothel in Nevada appeared on MSNBC tonight. He could barely form a coherent sentence, but I assume he is very hot under those clothes and chances are the women seeking his company won’t be interested in conversation.
HBO will be making a documentary about the place. I just wonder how successful it will be – maybe I’m naive, but the idea of loads of women buying sex that way seems, well, skeevy, and men are much more comfortable with skeeviness than women are.
Buy American Dolls This Holiday
More power to American Doll for not buckling to radical hate groups and continuing to raise money for Girls, Inc., a nonprofit group with 140 years of history.
So if you have a daughter, be sure to buy her an American Doll this year, as they have shown courage in supporting American democratic values – so many companies buckle to these loud-mouth zealots who want to force their belief systems on others.
Your Mommy’s a Whack Job
PETA’s new brochure, Your Daddy Kills Animals, really takes the cake. Men who fish might end up killing the family dog! It would be great if someone would write counter-comics for these absurd pieces that try to frighten children. Just take a look at this screen grab of part of their brocure:
Nice.
If anyone is an artist and would like to work on the counter-comic, “Your Mommy Is a Whack Job” let me know. I’m thinking pictures of hysterical looking women throwing blood on people wearing fur, releasing monkeys from labs, nutso stuff like that, with a little warning for children, “You might want to call social services if you are not getting enough protein in your diet and feel weak at school. Also, steer kooky mommy away from people who appear to be preaching as they might be from a cult and your mommy is probably very impressionable and may end up joining. You could end up in a cult like one run by Charles Manson and your mommy might make you do awful things to promote the beliefs of the cult!”
Some other brochure titles to consider: “Your Mommy Has Too Much Time on Her Hands,” “Your Daddy Cares More About Fishies Than Starving AIDS Babies in Africa,” “Maybe If You Were a Puppy or a Kitty Your Mommy Would Love You Too”
Saddam Punched for Insulting Shia Saints
Ah…to be a fly on the wall of this courtroom.
Rioting in Paris Continues
The problems run deep in the suburbs of Paris – you can bet it will only get worse. As Americans we certainly know that segregation – social and economic – usually results in this sort of thing.